In this step, your goal would be to combine what you have learned so far - about spiders and about yourself, as well as to add something extra that will help you cope with your fear in a much better way.
Now that you have identified the aspects of your phobia, as well as the way they manifest, you can work on making some positive changes.The first major step here is finding a means of interacting with spiders that you can take control of.
Try and rank experiences you have had with spiders, on a scale from 1 to 10. As an example, being close to a live spider may be 10, while seeing a cartoon spider may be equivalent to 1. Identify a category that would be described by each number, from 1 to 10.
It is entirely up to you what you will put in each level, just make sure it is accurate for you and the experiences you have had so far. This stage should help you feel a bit more in control. Make sure you write down your ranking, because we're going to use it later.
Starting at level 3 or 4, put yourself in these situations and gradually build up the amount of time you stay in them. At first you may react in the way that you normally do, and that's fine. Gradually, as you build up the time, you will feel more comfortable. Start with 30 seconds at a time, and build up to a minute, then 2 minutes, then 5, and go until you can get to ten minutes.
Next, go back to 30 second sessions, and work on controlling the way you behave. Try and sit in a neutral position when the spider experience starts, with your legs apart and your hands on your knees. Breathe slowly, whilst focusing on the spider.
Build this same process up until you can do ten minutes again, without getting up, or getting really wired by it.
Your next challenge is to go up a level – if so far you have been dealing with the situation you have ranked as 4, now is the time to go on to 5. The aim is for you to be able to do this with each thing on your list. The ultimate goal is seeing a live spider and not getting extremely upset by it.
Make sure you master one level and feel good with it, before proceeding to the next, otherwise you may actually end up with a stronger fear of spiders.